Surrender and letting go is scary and yet liberating all at the same time. It is an exposure of vulnerability and honesty we seldom as humans want to confront and explore. It takes courage, guts and trust. It takes being ok with outcomes and relinquishing pride and control and realizing that you never actually were in control in the first place. Surrender puts an emphasis on how small we are and yet how big it is of us to choose it.
I have found that right when I think I’ve mastered surrender, I am presented with an opportunity to become a student all over again. It never ends, It’s a journey. It’s the same with being honest. You don’t look up one day and arrive at being an honest person, you choose it every day just like integrity.
Surrender always feels big even on small things. It’s never easy but over time I can see how far I’ve come and that it has become a lifestyle for me. This Year has challenged me more than ever and I’ve had some pretty challenging years in the past. This year though, I have had to let go without the opportunity to say goodbye. I have had to surrender big things, heart things, deepest desires, even myself and just trust. It has been quite a ride but what I know for sure is that when I checked my heart, it’s intentions and decided to surrender all the things out of my control I can rest in the fact that all is ok and will be well. I surrender all.